I remember though. A big whale ate me.
Speedrunning death again? So, how was it? Did you get to top 500?
I lean in favor of open individualism these days, so yes, I was, am, and will continue to be plankton for as long as plankton continues to exist. And to be extra cliche, I am also you, and you, and you, and you, and I am he, as you are he, as you are me, and we are all together.
What if it includes the entire universe and the chances of being a human, on Earth, are just super incredibly slim?
All these memes about wanting to die: You could have been a chunk of ice orbiting Saturn, but you lucked into the single greatest thing the universe has to offer, sentient life.
How do we know sentience is the greatest? It could be peaceful just orbiting.
You wouldn’t know you’re alive though or even exist. You would just be.
Sounds like heaven to me, most of my troubles come from knowing what my situation is and how powerless I am.
Well now hold on…sometimes NOT knowing how bad you’re fucked is even worse!
For example…
tackles Squigglez to the ground, handcuffs them to the wall, and puts a hood over their face
See? Now you’re fucked, but the hood over your face makes it so you can’t see what I’m preparing, or how fucked you are!
Maybe I’m about to give you a ham dinner, or mabe I’m going to steal your kidneys. Who’s to say?
chainsaw revving
Now hold still…this is only going to hurt a lot.
Even if it’s just Earth, if we assume there is a degree of randomness in species assignment then you’ve got decent odds of reincarnating as an ant:
We conservatively estimate total abundance of ground-dwelling ants at over 3 × 1015 and estimate the number of all ants on Earth to be almost 20 × 1015 individuals. 1
And of course, massively high odds of being a bacteria. There are probably ~40 trillion bacteria living just in your body right now:
They estimate that the range of bacterial cells goes from about 30 to 50 trillion in each individual. 2
Now add the ocean. Yeah, we all spend billions of years coming back as bacteria
I mean that can explain a lot. I’ve always been a creature of great inertia, more like a tectonic plate than a human being
You could take refuge in the fact that you must have been a very good plankton to make it all the way to human in a single cycle.
Homie led the plankton revolt of 1831479QT, and ushered in a golden age of cooperation and peace between the sea Lords and planktonions, so that only the old, sick, and recently deceased plankton would fuel the hunger of the overlords, and doesn’t even remember
Damn, I didn’t realize plankton had it so hard. Makes sense that it would be krill or be krilled.
But human existence is suffering. Buddhism teaches that if you do incredibly well, you’ll be reborn as a being with a worry-free life. Being a plankton sounds exactly like that.
IMO human existence, with all its benefits, is waaaaay below plankton.
Interesting thought, but I’ll take thought over what’s basically water-grass.
I’ve tried thought. I’d like to go with plankton for a while now, thanks.
Thoughts and prayers. I hope you get your wish.
He was a good christian plancton.
Then wouldn’t he have gone to plankton heaven?
Let’s assume that reincarnation is real for all living things, and that you get reincarnated the moment you die. And you get to do it a lot.
Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Ant. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Mosquito. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Ant. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Amoeba. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Mouse. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. HUMAN!!! Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Ant. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Virus. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Mosquito. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria. Bacteria.
These odds aren’t promising either.
Wait a minute, I fucked up, viruses aren’t technically alive. Too bad, your soul is in it until it gets destroyed cause I’m not changing my original comment. You’ll just have to wait it out, then you can go back to being probably-but-not-always bacteria.
I guess it would explain why everyone can fucking eat me.
The ghost of Jeffery Dahmer has entered the chat.
Pretty sure that’s because humans are simply at the top of the food chain and can eat pretty much any other animal, including other humans.
In unrelated news: Would you like to come to my
Donnerdinner party?I use the name Donner to make restaurant reservations just to hear them say, “Donner, Party of four”
Thats an interesting take. Figure between sapient lifetimes there would likely be many on sentient lives and your last sentient life would just be a garble by the time you got a new one. Makes me wonder taking the idea that universe is just sorta sentience rearranged and you could then be rocks or beaches or such to. Its like life is a grade school play.
Technically it’s true. There’s a high chance bits and pieces of you have been used in other life several times, though you were more likely parts of plants than other creatures.
And when you die, you’ll be reused again. Nature has always been like that.
Guess I was a bad plankton :(
Does my previous life have any effect on my current life? If no, then if I don’t even remember, the fuck do I care?
