I notice this especially with my Norwegian learning. People are rude, call me names, or make fun of me on Reddit for using the wrong word or “en” vs “et” or using a direct translation because I don’t know how they say it in Norwegian, like saying somethng like «Ingen av bedriften din!» instead of «Dette er ikke din sak» (according to the casual version of Bing Translate) whereas a Norwegian-speaking Fediverse member would just say something like “You’re doing good, but it’s actually _____.”
That hasn’t really been my experience. Lemmy seems nicer on the surface because most of the userbase is ideologically aligned, so conflict is less likely. But once you make the wrong noises about something, plenty of people show up ready to prove just how mean and horrible they can actually be.
Also, on Reddit I never had anyone follow me around trying to cause reputational damage by spreading false accusations about me.
But once you make the wrong noises about something, plenty of people show up ready to prove just how mean and horrible they can actually be.
This is true. Linux isn’t my platform of choice, and the “passion” of the responses that provokes is remarkable.
Yeah ive been jumped on hard here for referring to a she as a he when she was referred to as “CEO of x company”.
I mean…that’s just Tuesday on the internet in 2026. Sadly.
“Wrong noises” is a good framing. But it can be good too, in enforcing careful posting hygiene (ala “belt and suspenders” - cross your t’s and dot you i’s).
It’s sad that we have to assume defensive posture as s.o.p…but yeah, here we are.
To say it in the language of my people: shit’s fucked.
PS: I hope you got squared away ok, cause that cyberstalking thing sounds all manner of bullshit.
I hope you got squared away ok
Nah, they’re still on it - and considering how much you’ve been discussing AI here too, it’s more than likely you’ve run into them as well.
Being careful with your words helps to some extent, but then there are people like this who don’t really care what you actually say. If they perceive you to be on the wrong side of an issue they care deeply about, they slap this cartoon-villain stereotype on you and treat it as fact. It’s not about what you said - it’s about who they think says those kinds of things. It’s intentional misinterpretation and ad hominems all the way down. No point even trying to engage with their insane troll logic.
Oh, I had my run in with anti-ai folks already. Probably we’re talking about the same “lobster”, non?
Wrt insane troll logic: I have on old friend who made a good distinction. “The difference between a glutton for punishment and a gourmand for punishment is that the latter can eat garbage and transmute it into energy.”
I dunno if he was right, but it does remind me to go outside, touch grass and wrestle with my kids from time to time.
Also, on Reddit I never had anyone follow me around trying to cause reputational damage by spreading false accusations about me.
I’ve experienced it on both, but it was much more toxic and persistent on reddit in my experience
ITS THE BOTS, its to create divisive in every reddit it goes to, so people will overreact. Also alot niche subs will gatekeep the subject alot.
Theory:
People on Lemmy self select to be here, usually as a direct backlash to prevailing Reddit culture, management or behaviour.
Evidence: https://lemmy.world/post/41398418/21528414
Reddit is mainstream, discoverable, friction free for the masses.
OTOH, there is small (albeit deliberate friction) in engagement here, that hearkens back to USENET days. It’s analog, messy and human. There are some bots here (to be sure) so I don’t know how long the Golden Age of Lemmy will exist, but clearly this space was designed by someone who knows the old magics. It shows.
Therefore, if you posit an inverse correlation between “is an utter cunt” and “wants to interact on niche social media forum called Lemmy”, I think you’d have a safe bet.
It’s not a hard gate by any means, but it gambles (correctly IMESHO) on friction keeping the biggest trolls away. The ROI for being a cunt is demonstrably higher on Reddit, Tiktok etc. Bigger bucket.
Result: Lemmy is a nicer place to visit. For now.
Also, yes: I am Australian. Does it show? Cunt cunt cunty cunt cuntington III.
You’re doing good, but both “ingen av bedriften din” (no one of your company) and “dette er ikke din sak” (this is not your case) is equally wrong. Both are saying English phrases in Norwegian, which makes it sound strange. This is the closest I can think of in the early morning fog of mind: “Ha’kke du no’ med” - østlandsk “Har ikke du noe med” - bokmål
Instead of translating English phrases, I’d recommend trying to look up Norwegian phrases and see if any fits your need.
Reddit is full of angsty teenagers, bots, and American leftists that hate their dads. Sometimes they’re all the same account.
Hope you find more friendly folks here 🫡
Reddit is big enough that it’s a microcosm of humanity. The Fediverse hasn’t reached that level yet.
When I was on Reddit, most of the subreddits I hung out on were small, supportive, and friendly. A few I monitored weren’t — on purpose, so I could see what was going on in other places.
Funny thing is, for the most part, I’ve found matches for all those subreddits on Lemmy communities— although I had to browse through a bunch of hosting services to build up the same level of diversity.
1 . The extra steps to find a fedi instance and create a new account is usually too tedious for the post-first-think-later kind of guy.
2 . The like/dislike function are present, but the lack of shitty function like karma, medals etc. don’t push the users in some kind of frenzy “contest” where copy-pasted crap or Ai-slop flood the platform.
3 . The flow of new contents is too slow to encourage doom-scrolling types. The users who stays more of a week are usually people interested in discuss things and actually “read” other comments.
Don’t worry, there are pockets of rude people on here, too. Because that culture is spilling over everywhere.
I think it has to do with community size. Even on reddit, the smaller and more insular communities are much more pleasant than the frontpage ones.
yep the smaller subs feel like a whole different website. The main pages have so much political doom and rage bait in my experience.
I found that you get the biggest upvote response when you are either edgy or more black and white takes. Medium takes may be both more correct and nicer overall, but they don’t get the most engagement. I would find that after I had a “big comment” that did well, I would make edgier comments for a while after, chasing that high.
That’s not so much a problem here since a thread doesn’t have thousands and thousands of comments or is flights against for attention. Typically I read all the comments on a Lemmy post. Doing the same on Reddit would both suck away my time and my soul, haha.
I totally feel this among small communities too. If you’re gonna be scathing and demeaning in a small community, you’re gonna run out of people to talk to real fast
I think some bots are trained to be controversial and mean. Controversial take would be that age verification roots out the young pranksters from certain communities.
There was that post on scissor statements recently which might explain a lot, or just be conspiracy. https://slatestarcodex.com/2018/10/30/sort-by-controversial/
Not disagreeing with the other comments here but I’d add that hostility breeds engagement, and for sites like Reddit, engagement equals more time spent on the site and more opportunities to serve ads.
Whether intentional or not, the algorithms push more aggressive/rude/hurtful comments to the top. Reddits business is making money off you while lemmy is just there. I expect that accounts for some of what you see
There’s plenty of rude people here are you kidding? People are rude to me just because I’m on lemmy.ml lmfao…
first ml upvote in a very long time
now get back in your box
You could always switch instance though. That’s a thing you can do in the Fediverse. You can’t do that on Reddit.
rude disgruntled noises
As long as you’re not a tankie!
Aww. Can we be luxury gay space communists then?
I meant less rude but I understand… that sucks so hard though 😭
Why are people so rude on Reddit
Yes.
Probably just the law of large userbases. The more people around, the more rude people there are likely to be. Rude people are always a minority, but they tend to be more vocal.
A large portion of fediverse users have abandoned Reddit for moral or ethical reasons. So while occasionally people will be rude here, it tends to skew more towards polite discussion.
Large userbases, and the “somebody is wrong on the internet” effect. If we like something we see we’ll possibly like/upvote it and move on with our life, if we see a problem we’re far more likely to jump on and interact. So a hundred people might read something and be neutral towards it, and it’s enough to have one asshole react poorly to ruin the mood completely.
The same dynamic works for reply guys, and sadly the fediverse is in no way immune. But hopefully there are more people on here who are aware that it’s a community building exercise, and who make an effort to leave a positive footprint. :)
It depends on your communities. There are plenty of proudly toxic people on the fediverse.
