As she waits for a decision in the Ter Apel asylum seekers’ center in the Netherlands, Arc is pessimistic about her chances. She says Dutch government employees have told her they don’t want to “p*** off” the U.S. by branding it an unsafe country.

She expects to be deported, and when that happens, she fears that the Trump administration will find some pretext to imprison her with men.

“I don’t want to be the person that makes the Netherlands decide it’s not safe for trans people [in the U.S.], and change their policy,” she says. “But I suspect that one of us would have to get killed for that to change.

“Which one of us will get to be that person?”