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not-so-fun fact: animals held in captivity tend to experience far more anxiety than out in the wild. Having predators chase you is less stressful than being locked in a box with little to threaten you.
Some postulate that civilization is just humans keeping themselves in captivity.
two things can be true
No it’s definitely the latter
Even in the best circumstances, ADHD still produces worse outcomes for many things: relationships, risk taking behavior (e.g. driving recklessly), unhealthy stimulation seeking (e.g. drugs). We are very capable of screwing up our lives even without society’s help.
if cars weren’t meant to go 100 then why do their speedometers go past it?
One of the many reasons I have permanently sworn off any sort of romantic entanglement with anyone. I will die alone. Not everyone gets to be happy anyway so meh, I’m just accepting it early.
What? How is adhd any possible reason to swear off all romantic entanglement? Like adhd can make dating harder to stay interested and it can mean you need to find someone who is okay with the fact that you have ADHD so you aren’t constantly trying to mask it but that still leaves a very sizable portion of the population.
The way you phrased that comes off to me as “the only food near me is a banana that I would have to get up and peel before I could eat it so I guess I’ll just starve to death not everyone deserves to eat”
Sorry, my comment was very unclear if that’s how you’re taking that.
When I said one of the many reasons I meant that I have a literal laundry list of reasons that I’ve permanently sworn off romantic entanglements so that I don’t cause emotional grief for other people as well as causing the emotional grief for myself. Like I don’t want to get into a relationship because I have so much baggage that I’m having a difficulty dealing with on my own. I don’t want to put that on someone else.
The ADHD portion is just that I am dealing with my ADHD very badly. If I’m dealing with it that badly on the surface then it will only compound further issues down the line for me.
I was speaking from a personal perspective, not as a universal truth or that it applies to anyone else but me. Genuinely sorry it came off other than how I intended.
Romantic relationships aren’t for everyone such as people who are aromantic but if you crave romantic relationships and are only holding them off because you might give others grief then you should seek therapy. I don’t mean that in a “you are crazy talk to a therapist way” but in a hopefully you can talk through that laundry list with a professional and they can give you insight on how to proceed.
You shouldn’t tiptoe through life saying “I don’t deserve happiness” because we all do and a mental health professional can hopefully help show you how for your specific situation
If therapy were an option, I would have taken it by now. Unfortunately, such things are not available to me. At least, not therapists that are willing to take me on. Primarily due to the fact that I have had therapists in the past openly say that they are not qualified to handle my case. So I’ve just given up. Some people just aren’t meant to be happy. So now I guide others to a treasure I may never possess.
Anyway, time for WILTY and sleep. Have a good night.
It took me 4 years and 6 therapists to find the right one. My therapist has adhd, I love her.
Take a break, but don’t give up on helping yourself
Neurodivergence only becomes a disability in context of the society you live.
The medication serves to make your brain chemistry adapt to the fact you live in a world that is increasingly more tailored for the majority of people who are differently wired then us. Its also focused on solving what other people find problematic and less what people themselves need.
Some people perceive an adhd/autism epidemic, my take is that as high pressure society evolves it becomes increasingly harder to fit the norms, people that once did now don’t.
A good example is how i am very sensative to certain artificial light sources that give me a literal headache. If i lived in the past, those light sources would not exist to trouble me. If everyone else would get the same headache wed simply stop producing that type of cheap lights.
Neurodivergence only becomes a disability in context of the society you live.
I’m going to have to agree to disagree on this one.
Whilst I agree that society adds a ton of extra barriers for us neurodivergent people, there are still a lot of people who would genuinely still struggle to function in a perfect society. E.g. high support needs autistic folks.
Even without society, I would still have debilitating interoception issues, executive dysfunction etc.
I have considered this point before and i settled on the perspective that neurodivergence does not replace the concept of a disability.
You can be neurodivergent and still experience a general disability at the same time. But I don’t view the neurodivergence as the reason why there is a disability.
In a similar vein I speculate it might be possible for neurological disabilities that exist but that only affects some neurotypes. Similar to how a disease can adversely affect different sexes. But that would be something future psychology will have to answer, not me.
Neurodivergence is a basic part of humanity and always has been. A group with a mixture more easily handles challenges as different people accomplish different things. Obsessing about details is a benefit under the right circumstances. Being impulsive is a benefit for trying new things, like eating new things. Following other people’s lead when it works is great so not everyone is trying new things.
Heck, not perceiving reality accurately can be a benefit if it means getting a new perspective on things. That is why so many cultures have appreciation for hallucinating in controlled settings.
Society punishing non-conformity is the underlying problem for sure, where everyone is expected to fit in a narrow scope called neurotypical which in my opinion is not typical at all.
I don’t need medication to function in society.
I need medication to function when left to my own devices.
Yeah, same here. I don’t take meds to fit into society’s idea of a functional human. I take meds because I can’t function even when by myself-
Exactly what I was gonna say. There’s certainly a good number of people that take medication simply to function in the way society wants them to, but there are also a good number of people that will sit on the couch motionless for hours trying to figure out how to start functioning at all if unmedicated.
I get the post is a joke but it feels kinda belittling to those in the latter group.
Yeah, that’s my take. There are times I sit at my desk after little kids go to bed thinking about the short list of 5-10 minute tasks I had planned afterwards, only to end up sitting for hours trying to muster up the motivation to get even just one of those tasks done, ultimately never even starting them. It’s incredibly frustrating. I have motivation, I have energy, but for some fucking reason that part of my brain says “nope, 7:30 is too close to 8:00, which is too close to 9:00, which is too close to bedtime, therefore it’s too late to start anything”
Meds have helped immensely. This meme, while it got a small chuckle out of me, doesn’t really apply to most people who needs meds to function.
I am the same way and hearing people talk about adhd as a superpower just bothers me so much because of how debilitating it is.
It just feels like seeing a person with a sprained ankle talk about how people in wheelchairs actually have the advantage because they can do jobs where they sit all day without getting antsy and want to go for a run and they say they that to a group of people who lost both their legs
I’m sure there are all kinds of different cases, but let me just say that I didn’t have to hustle nearly this hard just to get by in w 2005. It was fine that I was “absent minded” but now it’s like everyone’s got to be full-on all the time.
Like wtf happened?? Things used to be chill, now we’re fighting over the meagrest scraps.
Yes
We are the society.
We’re not. Society isn’t just some group in a small social media.
Well yeah, not with that attitude.
I was just chatting with some people about how I’ve discovered how bad habit and conditioning affect neurotypical people. This was in the context of visual, audio, and other gender cues that cause NT people to misgender trans and non binary people. I had recently discovered how the gender conditioning can make it difficult for NT people to change when things are automatic in their brains. They aren’t used to having to concentrate to remember words like i do, so they don’t have that easy place to inject conscious decisions.
So yeah, there are some things we are superior at and if NT people would just accommodate our disadvantages, our advantages could benefit them. But the current political atmosphere is isolationist and individualism, so they want everything to benefit them since they can’t stand to collaborate to get the benefits we offer.
