• 5 Posts
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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: June 16th, 2023

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  • That was always my assumption of the end game. You have the system prompts, an advertising bias prompt layer over top, then the user prompts.

    “Naturally worded” advertising that doesn’t immediately appear to be advertising and searching using natural language always seemed to be the biggest use cases for LLMs to me, considering they can’t be relied on to output accurate info.


  • People can work around a horrifying amount of mess for a dizzying amount of time before it all comes crumbling down due the wrong thing occurring at the right time.


    All of these examples are from finance companies, mostly banks. Not all my stories, these include stuff from friends in the field.

    I know a place that had no documentation on access revocation for >30 third party systems.

    Another with no Identity and Access Management policy until the pandemic. Service accounts with god level access? Go ahead and set an 8 character password with no expiration date, and never change it after 20+ employees who know it leave.

    One place with software that sits installed on computers within reach of the public where every client copy includes a password decryption function in a file that you can copy out of the client install and then just call it from whatever program you write. Yeah, you still need read access to the user database’s password field, but this was software that employees used to interact with bank accounts. With trivially reversible decryption.

    That last software was slated to retire over a decade ago, and last I heard was being kept alive by the finance company paying for source code access and maintaining their own edited version themselves. The last time my friend talked about it a year or two ago, the software was just shedding its reliance on Internet Explorer and shifting to Edge.

    Some federal processes and laws still require fax communications for various financial shit behind the scenes.


    Do what you can to steer out and away, keep your hands off it/don’t perpetuate it, have a threshold for “fuck it, not my problem to fix”, have another threshold for “fuck it, let it burn or they won’t learn”, have a third for “fuck it, I’m running before this eats me”, and always always always cover your ass. In writing, hard copy somewhere you control and work doesn’t.

    Ultimately, remember that companies don’t reward heroics. Unless you can quantify your improvements in manager-speak, it won’t even register to them. They don’t give awards out for burning yourself alive to keep the engines running for another day. They give out penalties when your changes result in temporary setbacks during adjustments to the new normal.

    There are many, many, many people in management and elsewhere that do not learn until they’ve been bit in the ass (if they are capable of learning at all). If you eliminate the friction before they feel it, they won’t know you’ve done anything at all. You want to look good, that’s how you move up. Let some things fall. Let some things break, especially when you know the fix is relatively easy and no one wants to take responsibility to ok it before SHTF.


    A ton of this job is managing people, at least as much as it is managing complex systems. Not to be sociopathic, never forget the people are people, but start looking at corporate interactions and politics like you might look at a complicated system with no or little documentation.






  • Absolutely normal. One thing to be wary of is that over time you will adjust to the new normal, and it may not feel euphoric any more. Don’t immediately assume that just because things don’t feel amazing anymore it means it isn’t working. Also, don’t assume that it is working if you don’t feel it anymore. Yes, that’s conflicting advice.

    Welcome to the catch-22. If I have a lapse in my meds, the first few days back on I usually feel euphoric and have issues sleeping. Then it usually evens back out to my medicated “normal” on the third or fourth day. Over time you’ll get a sense for “my meds are working” and “no they aren’t”. I’ve had to adjust my dosage up and down over the last 15 years to get things just right.

    Also, if you do lapse your meds after being on them for a while, you may legitimately have a withdrawal. Yeah, there’s all the negative stigma around that word and illicit substances, but it also applies to some doctor prescribed stuff too. About 3 or 4 days without I get extra cranky, extra unfocused, and usually get a nasty headache. Then it balances out to my “unmedicated normal”.



  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.comtoMemes@sopuli.xyzShe only wanted the ring bros
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    26 days ago

    You need some therapy. You divorced his dumb ass and you clearly have strong feelings about it still. Trauma is valid, but taking it out on an entire gender isn’t.

    The entire point of this sub thread is “this still sometimes happens to guys who aren’t massive piles of shit”, and all of your responses amount to “No, you are all piles of shit! Only piles of shit ever feel this way, so by definition you’re a pile of shit!”

    It’s some really disgusting circular logic. There are horrible assholes out there like you say. There’s way too many of them. But you keep making massive assumptions about the commenters here with no evidence whatsoever, then burning the assumptions at the stake as truth.

    Just give it a rest. I’m truly sorry your ex was terrible, and it sounds like divorce was letting him off easy.



  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.comtoMemes@sopuli.xyzShe only wanted the ring bros
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    26 days ago

    Holy shit I really got to you didn’t I?

    I saw you made two responses to my comment showing you were wrong. I knew you were big mad, but this is hysterical. I didn’t realize you were having a full on breakdown outside our little sub-comment chain.

    You’re yapping an awful lot about “I have hot sex with my wife” for a guy supposedly happy, stable, and a better husband than the rest of us InCeLs. Thanks man, you’ve just made the next couple days for me.

    Edit: For context, this guy called me an incel and heavily implied I had no idea what the fuck I was talking about. I clapped back with a picture of my hand, wedding ring, my toddler’s foot, and a hand written timestamped note telling him to go fuck himself. He’s been flying off the handle making absurd accusations since.


  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.comtoMemes@sopuli.xyzShe only wanted the ring bros
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    27 days ago

    I don’t think you know me at all, and you need to stop attacking shadows.

    Is that enough evidence for you? My hand with my wedding ring, a few of my daughter’s toes at the top, and an old school style hand written timestamped note.


    My two year old daughter has been having awful allergies since last night, when I slept on the floor in her room so I could comfort her when she kept waking up coughing throughout the night despite having doctor approved antihistamines, some “all natural”/home remedy cough syrup, and an albuterol rescue inhaler. I used the snot sucker, warm water to help cut the mucus, kept her propped up to help with breathing and mucus drainage. My wife got a full night of rest. No baby monitor, no interruptions.

    This morning I’m also solo for around four and a half hours while my wife goes and does a weekly thing that helps keep her real passion (that she can’t do for a living unfortunately) alive.

    I’m not looking for an award for doing the husband and father thing. I’m not expecting anything from her for this, and I’m not expecting anything from the internet or the comment section at large. I don’t need fucking “good boy points”.

    What I need is for chucklefucks like you to just fucking stop. Stop telling every man with issues in their relationship that it is always without a doubt their fault. That they clearly don’t understand. That they’re having unreasonable expectations. That there is absolutely 0% chance they’re anything but wrong. Just take a step back and leave room for not even bare minimum understanding or sympathy, but just keeping your damn mouth shut if all you have is throwing shade.


    Long as we’re throwing the “I’m actually a better more understanding husband than you and you don’t understand childbirth” shit around, let me slap my metaphorical cock on the table.

    My wife hemorrhaged two thirds of the blood in her body during childbirth. The first moments of holding my child were struck through with concern that I was losing my wife. The nurses had the god damn crash cart ready.

    Your insight into the birthing process is not unique.


    I’ll say it again. This entire subthread has been born from the condition “what if the man wasn’t a shitpile”, and 90% of the responses have been bunch of people incapable of accepting that as a possibility, building strawmen, and then don quixote-ing themselves into a sense of moral superiority. Just fucking stop.


  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.comtoMemes@sopuli.xyzShe only wanted the ring bros
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    27 days ago

    I think your point about differing needs is really the core of all of the friction. At least when we’re not talking about the worthless kind of husband demanding shit and not actually being present etc.

    I can only speak for myself, but the presence or lack of physical intimacy has a massive effect on whether or not I feel: valued, appreciated, or desired in a relationship. Lack makes me start thinking things like “Am I your partner, or just the providertm? Do you actually want me around when I’m not providing value, doing things for you? Is this a job or a relationship? Are you no longer attracted to me? Do you even really want to be near me, spend time with me?”

    And note I keep using the phrase “physical intimacy”. I’m not a prude, if I meant sex I’d say it directly. That’s part, but not all of it.

    When we potato on the couch, has it literally been months since my partner sat next to or leaned on me? Are they literally sitting on the opposite side, as far as they can possibly get away? Ok, is it a “I don’t feel safe” thing? No, they’ll sit with me when I ask, or when I go to them, but never of their own accord.

    Stuff like that builds up over time, and personally, when I talk about stuff like this I’m talking patterns of behaviour over years, not “wah wah I couldn’t get the nookie when she was trying to figure out how to get a newborn to sleep through the night”.

    So it’s infuriating when the horde comes out to insist the only reason there could possibly be problems is if the guy is a shitpile, and that there’s always layers upon layers for why it’s never okay for a man to feel anything about a lack of physical intimacy. For fucks sake I do my part, I do everything I can to meet her emotional and other needs. Am I not allowed to feel like I’m being treated as a roommate rather than a partner? Am I not allowed to feel like I’m not desired? What about my own emotional needs? No, because so many shitpile men exist I guess.


  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.comtoMemes@sopuli.xyzShe only wanted the ring bros
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    27 days ago

    That is a complete and total strawman. No one has said anything about such clearly unreasonable shit like wanting sex immediately after a newborn, or while the woman is recovering/post-partum/etc.

    How is anyone supposed to have a calm and respectful conversation about this stuff when the moment you even brush up against it slightly, the “men are all horrible awful pigs and it’s all their fault” brigade comes out in full force?

    I’m sorry so very many people have encountered so many god awful men as they have. I am, as best as I can, doing what I can to not be one of them.

    And there are still intimacy issues in my relationship. Am I not allowed to talk about this because so many men have been awful that it’s just verboten? Fuck everything about that.



  • This is a severely under-discussed consequence of modern culture distancing family “connections”.

    Don’t get me wrong, there’s only about 4 people on my side of the extended family I actually miss, and 3 on my wife’s side. That’s being generous. But not having that reliable help if you don’t have an absolutely amazing social group makes raising a kid through early childhood an absolute slog.


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    28 days ago

    Long as it’s still the man’s fault for desiring intimacy, am I right or am I right ladies?

    The assumption that it’s always a neglectful husband causing marital issues is incredibly demoralizing, especially when the response to “but what if it isn’t a neglectful husband” is this sort of thing. Just more reasons why the man is the one being unreasonable.

    Look, no man is “owed” their wife’s affections or physical intimacy. But it is often an important piece of an adult romantic relationship, and it’s not unreasonable for a member of that relationship to have some feelings about things changing over time, or suddenly for that matter.