Feels that way for some of us older voters, too.

Fuck it, I’m ready, bring on the Death Balls

Inb4 “dEmOnRaTs ArE WASTING aLl YoUr TaX dOLlArS mOdIfYiNg tHeIr PaLaCe!”

We’ve got a void who loves all kinds of confined spaces – boxes, bags, kitchen cabinets, bedroom closets, under the bed… We’re always having to search the house to find her new nap spot.

But her favorite thing is to be petted in the bathtub (not unlike a box). She meows for you to follow her to the tub, meows to indicate you need to put down a towel for comfort, then jumps in and meows for you to get in, too. Nothing makes her happier.

See: Tragedy of the Commons

100% legit, and John Paul Sheptock is the executive producer.

We’ve always referred to this behavior (getting up somewhere just to look down on everybody) as “gargoyling.”

“Vance, clear my schedule for the next two weeks – I’ve got an important project I need to personally oversee.”

Dr. Oz, you’re up!

Wait til you see what’s under the barrel.

Literally and figuratively.

Surely those who vote for the worst human beings imaginable will be spared from their wrath, right?

Right??

Upvoted, but God damn this cut me deep.

Here’s something a little more verbose to tack on, which helped me a lot through a similar time:

Yes, death. Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one’s head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forget life, to be at peace. You can help me. You can open for me the portals of death’s house, for love is always with you, and love is stronger than death is.

- Oscar Wilde, The Canterville Ghost (1887)

I like to think she was just some lady who got hit on the head by a falling coconut, and that turned her into the cartoon character she was when we all met her, and since then she recently got hit by another coconut and now this is who she is.

I had a cat named Kiki years ago who was a doppelganger for your Sesam… Truly one in a million. Was nice to see a little echo of her today. Hope you all are living your best life!

Winning™!

We’ll see this exact headline presented unironically as news every few months for the full duration of the Turd Reich.

These are the same folks that routinely choose to eat shit sandwiches in the hopes that a demonrat lib might catch a whiff of their breath.

Would have made all of Disney and Universal’s IP buy-ups over the last decade+ a lot more interesting.

“Stupid doodie heads, the lot of 'em,” Miller was also heard to have said before lying down for his afternoon nap. “A bunch of stinky, dumb, poo poo butts,” he murmured, just moments before sucking his thumb and being tucked in.