Everyone that voted for Cheeto Christ has willingly put their teeth to the curb, so SUKBRICK isn’t far off.

“Let me put my my burned CD of mp3s into my discman that is connected to a tape adapter.” Me, until about when Zunes hit,Woot for$99.

I’m guessing anyone patronizing a pub that is crawling with cats has already been exposed to toxoplasmosis, to be fair.

‘Born to shit, forced to wipe.’

The opposite of this is being that one kid in your kindergarten that completely drops trow at the urinal.

I imagine anyone trying to extract intelligence from that weird guy would end up less informed than before.

The break reminder is just a legal obligation, they can still give you the stink eye when you say you’re taking a break and brag about how long they’ve worked without a break.

We have a daywalker amongst us…

“Have you tried unplugging your Pyramid and plugging it back in?”

Honest question: what do we call who is driving the engine?

Oh, Willy, calm down. Its almost Scotchtober.

I want the milkman to deliver my milk… in the myorning.

To be fair, it has the most boots to be licked and some people have urges that the rest of us will never understand. /S

As a child of the 80s and former smoker, I actually find the lingering smell of cigarettes in a smoking room super comforting, to the point that if a hotel has a smoking room option I take it.

You can tell you did a good job if an ethereal slide whistle plays as you do this.

My grandma got mighty upset when I tried to polish her whole head.

It could be a regional thing. Where I’m from a screw with a single straight slot can be called a flathead whether the actual head of the screw is flat or domed.

I keep YouTube videos turned down to 360 for this reason.

I get a strange feeling of vertigo if I see hd content above 30fps. The first time I met friends in a bar that was plastered with big screens playing a football game at 60fps was very uncomfortable.

Self defenstration! Genius.

I paid for an argument!