You can’t pull off a sweet uppercut by punching down.

I hate that. So much so, that when I do get a chance to see my friends I haven’t seen in a while, I always try to remember what I wore last time and avoid it.

Transfers, yes, but if you’re careful, those germs on your hands will never get to your face, but a kiss is direct infection.

Fun fact! I never knew!

Oh yeah! I fucking love eating!

No, but there are so many American sub cultures, I didn’t want to try to include them all or speak for any others.

It’s the illusion of democracy. We are voting to fill these positions, but we might as well be picking ponies at the track. If they wear our favorite color and we like the sound of their name, then we vote them in.

And every year, the corporations parade their puppets about and we choose the shiniest one.

'Murican male culture isn’t real keen on kissing. It is reserved for your romantic interest. It would be very inappropriate to give a peck on the cheek or even blow a kiss to a friend or acquaintance.

To clarify, I don’t mean American culture, I mean 'Murica. White Christian small town America.

In most cases, I’d probably recommend the family business, but your parents are abusive and they should have as little involvement in your life as possible.

ALWAYS relevant.

It has to be the same person, right?

And they all have Chlamydia!

We consume information like Koalas consume eucalyptus.

We stuff our faces with toxic filler with little to no nutritional value, until we get sick and pass out. Just to wake up and do it all over again.

Wait. You aren’t?!?

Let me go ask AI and copy the response for you.

You know, things and stuff.

They are, but the cans are full of tear gas.

The worst thing about this is that I can never find my apps. I need to check on Verizon, so I scroll down to the Vs. Nope, it’s in with the Ms.

You’re not wrong.

Should we feel bad for someone when this happens to them? Absolutely!

Should we feel any worse about this person than any other person in the same scenario? Not at all.

I think it’s funny that I’ll come home from work and when asked “What happened at work today?” I’ll answer “nothing”, but then tell a few stories about what happened at work later on in the night as other things remind me of them.