Horrified by the recent murder of Kawthar al-Husayjawi, one of her female relatives describes what happened – and her fears for other women and girls forced into early marriage in Iraq
“… in that car with three men from the family that was supposed to be her circle of safety.”
In that society, no, they are not supposed to be her saftey net. Men aren’t even the same species in that society. People ask how could they… They don’t consider women as people.
Even in the western society, women generally have to live multiple lives. In public they are supposed to be beautiful and smiling all the time. In the bedroom they are supposed to be slutty (but only for their man). With children they are supposed to be saintly. In the home they are supposed to have the managment skills few CEOs possess.
Men these days are supposed to have only two personalities. At work and mixed company they are supposed to treat women like people and respect them. In the locker room, with their buddies, or behind closed doors, not so much.
That is why in some places, unmarried women are not supposed to be alone with a man. Because the men want to remove the “at work and mixed company” part so that they can drop one of those personalities. This murder is the result of taking away the time when women are supposed to be treated like people, and letting the men lean into the worst personality they can have.
While I can’t speak for the female perspective personally, nor can I pretend to speak for all men, I find the perspective you are presenting to be quite the generalization. There’s a reason people were outraged about Trump’s “locker room talk” excuse for his remark about “grabbing women by the pussy”, it’s certainly not the societal standard for men to become misogynistic molesters when they are in a safe space.
There’s a reason people were outraged about Trump’s “locker room talk” excuse for his remark about “grabbing women by the pussy”, it’s certainly not the societal standard for men to become misogynistic molesters when they are in a safe space.
I mean… It does seem at least half the voters in American society were not that upset by it.
If we assume that everyone who voted Trump in the 2016 elections were either okay with this or not offended enough not to vote for him, that percentage is actually more like 25-26% (He got about 63m votes in 2016 out of a voting eligible population of 243m). Still way too high if you ask me, but at least it’s not that bleak.
That’s an optimistic take. There are a great many reasons people didn’t vote, and it’s false on its face that they all stayed home because they didn’t condone his disgusting views on women. It’s not statistically unreasonable to assume the ratio of people who tolerate or even endorse Trump level misogyny extends equally through the non-voting population.
If we’re going to be part of the solution, we at least need to acknowledge the scale of the problem. There’s a gut reaction to want to assume the best, if only because the alternative is depressing and isolating, but not wanting to believe it’s that bad doesn’t make it wrong.
women generally have to live multiple lives. In public they are supposed to be beautiful and smiling all the time. In the bedroom they are supposed to be slutty (but only for their man). With children they are supposed to be saintly. In the home they are supposed to have the managment skills few CEOs possess.
Men these days are supposed to have only two personalities. At work and mixed company they are supposed to treat women like people and respect them. In the locker room, with their buddies, or behind closed doors, not so much.
Absolutely false in my country. Absolutely no one forces anyone to be different than they are, unless their normal state is impolite. No one says you must be a slut or a chauvinist or any of that, and I refuse to accept peer pressure as an external force guiding anyone’s behaviour past adulthood. I am sorry you live like you do, where you do, and I hope you know a better world one day.
“… in that car with three men from the family that was supposed to be her circle of safety.” In that society, no, they are not supposed to be her saftey net. Men aren’t even the same species in that society. People ask how could they… They don’t consider women as people.
Even in the western society, women generally have to live multiple lives. In public they are supposed to be beautiful and smiling all the time. In the bedroom they are supposed to be slutty (but only for their man). With children they are supposed to be saintly. In the home they are supposed to have the managment skills few CEOs possess.
Men these days are supposed to have only two personalities. At work and mixed company they are supposed to treat women like people and respect them. In the locker room, with their buddies, or behind closed doors, not so much.
That is why in some places, unmarried women are not supposed to be alone with a man. Because the men want to remove the “at work and mixed company” part so that they can drop one of those personalities. This murder is the result of taking away the time when women are supposed to be treated like people, and letting the men lean into the worst personality they can have.
While I can’t speak for the female perspective personally, nor can I pretend to speak for all men, I find the perspective you are presenting to be quite the generalization. There’s a reason people were outraged about Trump’s “locker room talk” excuse for his remark about “grabbing women by the pussy”, it’s certainly not the societal standard for men to become misogynistic molesters when they are in a safe space.
I mean… It does seem at least half the voters in American society were not that upset by it.
If we assume that everyone who voted Trump in the 2016 elections were either okay with this or not offended enough not to vote for him, that percentage is actually more like 25-26% (He got about 63m votes in 2016 out of a voting eligible population of 243m). Still way too high if you ask me, but at least it’s not that bleak.
That’s an optimistic take. There are a great many reasons people didn’t vote, and it’s false on its face that they all stayed home because they didn’t condone his disgusting views on women. It’s not statistically unreasonable to assume the ratio of people who tolerate or even endorse Trump level misogyny extends equally through the non-voting population.
If we’re going to be part of the solution, we at least need to acknowledge the scale of the problem. There’s a gut reaction to want to assume the best, if only because the alternative is depressing and isolating, but not wanting to believe it’s that bad doesn’t make it wrong.
That article is sus.
Absolutely false in my country. Absolutely no one forces anyone to be different than they are, unless their normal state is impolite. No one says you must be a slut or a chauvinist or any of that, and I refuse to accept peer pressure as an external force guiding anyone’s behaviour past adulthood. I am sorry you live like you do, where you do, and I hope you know a better world one day.