I would just make the general comment, in response to reading the various exchanges in this thread, that there is a lot of theory around this stuff, and yes there are studies that support some of it, but these theories are by no means something that should be taken as ‘fact.’ To the extent you find them useful in navigating the terrain they attempt to map, great, but I would avoid getting locked into these ideas in figuring out how to deal with emotions (your own or others) in real life.