I have a problem that every time i want to start new hobby, i cant work on it for long enough time to develop it into a habit. I quit the hobby i started even less than one month after starting it, even if i am excited and interested in working on it for a long time.
Since i dont know if i really have an adhd, because psychitriastists i went to say that i dont have adhd, despite i have common symptoms like lack of motivation, problems with learning and work, and problem with working on hobbies for a long time, i need to somehow find a way to work on a single hobby for a long time, without meds.
There is no secret sauce here. Either you choose to persevere against the un-enjoyable-ness, or you don’t. If this bothers you this much, try to find strategies for coping such as: lowering your expectations (perfection brings tedium and tedium is the enjoyment killer), shrinking your scope (less work, less chance of drowning in the enormity of the project), recommit to goals with rigor (sometimes you just gotta suck it up even if it isn’t enjoyable and you want that reward/payoff).
I find that often my hobbies don’t make me feel “I look forward to doing this” before I start, or even “I am enjoying doing this” once I do. But they do make me feel “I’m happy that I did this” after I’ve made some progress.
(This is a very hard lesson for me to truly internalize.)
It is also totally legit to do hobby things out of anger which is the obverse side of the “I’m happy that I did this” coin. Like, “this bothers me so much that I need to do this”. And then it is relief after it is done. Perhaps the less contentment-able (or low tolerance for settling) types of people can harness this power better.