Might help also to describe what you think feminism is, since it’s one of those terms that is overloaded.
I once had a physical therapist tell me she wasn’t a feminist because she thought women couldn’t be as physically capable as men when serving as soldiers, and seemed to believe feminism requires treating women exactly like men.
I told her I was a feminist because I believe in equal rights for men and women, an idea she did not seem so opposed to.
If you are not a feminist, you don’t believe in the equality of the sexes, right?
I’m not sure, this feels a bit like when people complain about “anti-fascist” as a label because it makes them feel pressured to be anti-fascist or otherwise be seen as sympathetic to fascism … my question is why is anti-fascism (or in this case, feminism) so hard to accept?
I guess feminism works precisely by getting us to think about sexism and whether we think that is acceptable or not - I don’t think it’s good to be sexist, and I think it’s reasonable to feel ashamed about being sexist. Social shame and taboo seems appropriate in this case, no? Like the anti-fascist example, fascists should be ashamed and face taboo for their views.
Not that you’re wrong, some people will double-down in the face of opposition, this is precisely why so many fundamentalist churches promote street preaching, it doesn’t convert people (which is the reason given for the activity), but it is effective at solidifying the loyalty of the member, since on the street they experience significant opposition, which bolsters their in-group identity. It’s like a cult dynamic.
So yeah, it’s probably good for social shame to be introduced for sexism, fascism, racism, etc. - but it’s not a complete victory, the shame can induce stronger loyalties to those movements for those who still hold the views despite their taboo status.
People are unique and everyone has varying opinions on every topic, so how can they be simplified to a simple yes or no. There is a spectrum for everything. People who are at extremes find it easy to fit in yes or no categories but everyone else feels lost.
For example, there can be a guy in a rural area who supports his family’s women by letting them go to school/college, working, dating who they want but he is very adamant that they should not dress and wear makeup like “whores”. Would you call him a feminist? Why or why not?
Yikes, this is a hard no. People don’t change their views like this. Also, you are being a bully if you shame people for anything. Just because you think you have a moral high ground does not make it okay to impose it on others. You are no different than religious evangelicals if you do.