For me having an official diagnosis first gave me words to research what was wrong with me since I had no clue.

Second, after thorough research it made me give myself permission to work with me and not against me - I wasn’t lazy or anything, I just genuinely was disabled. Having a diagnosis was my shield when someone called me that, and it was so fucking necessary as a late-diagnosef woman. Especially when it came to family to get them off my back.

In my case no medication, but the internal permission to cut myself some slack and figure out in what weird ways my brain works.

Edit: that was supposed to be a reply to someone - it’s been a long day 😅 @[email protected]

You’re quite new to the internet aren’t you? There’s tons of people trashing artwork made in Photoshop. Earlier today I saw a comic and everyone complained about how it shouldn’t have been made.

Not liking art is common on the internet. The difference between ai generated and human-created is that humans usually have an intention when they create. AI just… Creates.

In this case my interest was piqued why the subject matter, because it seemed to promise an interesting story. More interesting than memes are usually the stories behind the pictures used, and they often come from very different places.

This one had nothing. And that’s why the interest vanished. Not because it was AI or because I want to deny I had a feeling at first - simply because my expectations for a good story were disappointed.

Do with this what you want, if you want to keep trying to twist this into AI hate, you do you - I’ve explained myself and I’m not going to reply again :)

It was interesting… Not as a picture, but because the stuff depicted is so unusual. What was the story behind it?

…turns out there’s none. It’s just AI-generated. Very few pictures are interesting/awe-inducing as a picture, most of them fascinate because of the story they present a glimpse of. For me that’s the heart of pictures. And AI pictures are missing that.

So yeah, knowing it’s AI-generated instantly makes me uninterested in the vast majority of cases.

I’m not sure if what you describe is really an inability to get the big picture or the lack of available information to really base decisions on.

For me it’s hard to make that kind of decisions because other people can’t plan well and their estimates are notoriously wrong and forget to take into account a lot of things.

But what I’m really good at it seeing the bigger picture in the sense of knowing the interdependences between things. If I see a requirement I don’t just follow it point by point. I think about what how it fits into the whole and where things can go wrong and ask if people have considered that. (90% of time the answer is no)

So I consider seeing the big picture and the details my strength, but like you I struggle to plan ahead long-term or estimate things because I don’t feel confident with the amount of information available to make such guesses.

Seven in German handwriting has an additional line.

The guitar cat got me.

Can you control the time when a calendar notif hits? Could changing that time help?

Except some agents go against explicit instructions and delete the prod database. You know your argument doesn’t hold, we’ve all seen the news.

Sticks may be something that he has been hit with before - or maybe it’s the position above his head of something that scares him. You never know what a former stray experienced.

In my experience toy type matters a lot too. My current cat goes crazy over feathers at a rope that you can whirl around with a stick - I guess the sound the feathers make trigger her hunting instincts? Our other cat gets scared of that but hes always been sensitive to noise.

He loves those little snakes that are attached to sticks with a rope though. Leaves the feather cat completely cold. Catnip was meh for ours, but both lost their shit with Valerian, totally drugged up for five minutes (then the effect wears off and the cats won’t feel the same even with fresh scent). Where I live it gets used to help people sleep so we buy a whole bunch at a pharmacy, fill it into an airtight container (that shit stinks, it could make me vomit) and marinate cloth toys in their that we give them every now and then.

At the end of the day, all cats are different and trial and error is best. Also, if you found a cheap toy that works, stock up - often it’s not easy to get replacements once they break.

Wait you wouldn’t take your cat? After a week of you rarely being available you consider not being home at all for two days and a night?

I would strongly recommend against that. I’m worried that this may cause behavioral issues with the cat getting bored, depressed, feeling caged…

Possible consequences could be urinating outside the litterbox, willfully scratching your furniture/walls and more.

I’m not sure if with your work and travel habits a pet would be a good choice. Maybe one that doesn’t need social interaction?

I would advise against. A house is not a good place for a cat to be alone, and 40h per week is a lot. We have an old cat (17) and my roommate is at home all day and our cat still is super needy for attention.

There may be more aloof cats, but from my experience with cats they are most likely the exception and your cat would likely be understimulated.

Also, most cats do not handle traveling well. It is possible to train them but that works best when they are young and young cats should never be alone in a house for 40h/ week. My mom has taken in cats from an animal rescue organization where the owner was out for long hours too and she got depressed and overate so badly she had lifelong issues, even when she was with my mom and lost weight again. She also was incredibly anxious about my mom leaving her and would get stressed out if she had to be alone.

Despite what you may hear, cats are social animals and need interaction. If you are away from home 40h/week (and that’s not counting going to work), it’s better to get a bonded pair so they can play and interact. In rare cases you may find an old grumpy cat that will be fine - but you will probably never have a close bond with that kind of cat, and often they are used to going outside.

The cat violently displaced the Panda.

I mean that’s a black hat hacking forum. That alone would make me question what they were doing with their domains x)

Similar here, except I suggested a course and they accepted and paid for it (Software Testing). The programming is what I enjoy and want to pursue.

For me the commitment part was the issue. I’m still working on figuring out how to trick my brain into cooperating with commitments. Having a team that was looking forward to my suggestions and ready to rely on it ended up being the one thing that worked. But this is obviously not easily replicable.

I tried that several times but it never worked out for various reasons. For me I really started growing once I was working and had a team that was happy I wanted to learn more and answer my questions.

I’m like that and one of my friends as well. We’re both not diagnosed but strongly suspecting AD(H)D, and I’m also diagnosed with autism.

I can’t count the times I started trying to learn programming and ended up quitting for that very reason - but every time I did I knew a little bit more. So I just tried to learn my way and next time I wouldn’t need to look up asuch and got a little farther. But I also have the luck of having programmer friends who don’t mind trying to answer my sometimes very unusual questions, and over the several attempts I’ve learned enough to be able to work in test automation.

If you have patient and encouraging people around you you’ll eventually get there :) don’t go for ui at first, look for console programs so you can get to things like conditions and loops quickly. That’s where the meat is for me.

In Germany? :o

As a diagnosed German I can tell you not much changes, there’s virtually no therapy for adult autistics. I understand why your doc said that.

Though there was one large benefit for me and it’s that after we applied for disability the Arbeitsamt got much more lenient with me and was actually useful in helping me find a job.

In the end, if you can’t let go, seek the diagnosis, if not, take from autistic communities whatever little tricks help you, discard what doesn’t and call it a day. Much less trouble :)

There’s one thing in your post that I haven’t seen you mention yet it’s all over the place: depression.

I don’t know anything about you but this post, and I’m not a professional, but from very painful personal experience I’m almost sure you’re severely depressed, maybe even to the point where you need hospitalization.

Depression fucks with your head. It makes you not-do things you’re looking forward to and you don’t understand why. It makes you unable to see anything positive. You cannot get out of it without help after a certain point, and you cannot trust your own thoughts anymore.

These days, after years, I’m better. For me it’s never going completely away, but I recognize patterns, I know how to break the spiraling (and most importantly, no one shames me for how I’m doing it anymore) and I can say " this sounds like depression speaking, let me do something else and return to this thought tmr and see how I feel."

But it took years of therapy and several months of hospitalization. If you’re at the point where your outbreaks scare your family, maybe it’s time to look into that.

Another thing: depression in men is critically underdiagnosed, because most docs look for physical reasons if a man comes to them with symptoms of depression. If you haven’t been diagnosed yet, it may be that it didn’t occur to your doc, maybe because you’re masking well or because he’s just not used to seeing men with depression.

However you go on, I wish you all the best. I hope that you can find a way, with or without meds, to live in peace with your brain.

That smug face.