I am very comftable with he/him pronouns. Always was but recently I noticed that while I don’t go out of my way to use them I’m also fine with they/them pronouns being used on me.
It could be a phase but I’m not sure. It could also be that I tend to use they/them as an alternative in. I’m confused
Hoping to just add another perspective, not to give any advice because I really don’t give this much thought.
I am a man, I didn’t choose to be a man but I’m okay with it.
I don’t have any desire to change my gender or ask others to refer to me in a specific manner. He/him/they/them works for me and unless I am in a medical setting, I doubt I would even noticed if someone used she/her.
I don’t associate my choices and actions with “being a man” or whatever. The whole masculine/feminine thing doesn’t make sense to me.
I wear the clothes I wear because I like the way the look and feel, it may not be typically “masculine” to wear skirts but I’m a grown ass man so I’ll do what I want.
I haven’t experienced gender dysphoria so I can’t say anything about what it is like but it is a medical condition and if you’re really concerned then maybe you should talk to your primary physician or mental health professional.
I still remember the first time someone asked me “are you a man?”. He was trying to make a point, to get me to step up, and I think he was as much taken aback as I was when I literally could not answer the question. At the time it wasn’t so much about gender identity but more about how I still considered myself a kid even though I was 19, and I had never even contemplated the question before.
Despite that, it DID actually get me to thinking about it, and I’ve continued to think about it for another 35 years. And I’ve come to realize, gender has no meaning to me. I didn’t even know that was a thing until I recently looked through the wikipedia LGBTQ+ page and realized there’s all kinds of different terms for people in my position. All my life I’ve been called “sir”, “ma’am”, and “hey you”, and none of it makes me feel any different. I usually wear men’s clothes, but enjoy a night out in a tight corset and extreme heels. I’m happy just experiencing everything in life and I’ve never let society’s norms slow me down
It’s nice to finally know there are others out there like me though. And it’s perfectly fine to identify as any gender that feels right to you, or no gender at all. Life is good, do what makes you happy.
I can remember a similar circumstance and I remember it well, if it means anything to you, I wish my father was more like you.
Maybe I wouldn’t have had such a rough time with a better role model. Maybe my father would have done better too but that’s food my for my thoughts.
Can’t really say if I would have made a good father or not, unfortunately it wasn’t in the cards for me. My own father had no idea what to do, and that was even before it was obvious that I was different from other kids. He did the make the right call though, if he wasn’t sure then he just me be myself. Although I’m not sure how he would have handled things if I had discovered crossdressing at a much younger age.
I didn’t say you’d be good, mine certainly wasn’t, but the bar isn’t as high as many people would like to think.