He prescribes ibuprofen. You have a one in a billion allergy to one of the normally inert binders in the pill. You don’t tell him the entire truth about why you missed one of the questions on a quiz you got in second grade. He has to perform an exploratory ear amputation and reattachment to treat for potential parasites which is inconclusive but the way the stitches fit so precisely hints towards a plasticization effect which can only be lupus or thermogenic pulmerization of the t-cells exacerbated by stress induced by cheating, which is why you missed the question in second grade… You actually knew the answer but cheated off your friend who had the wrong answer the whole time!
He suggests an MRI, but you keep fainting in the machine and the results are always blurry. He breaks into your house and finds WW2 memorabilia that suggests you’re far older than you look. He runs blood tests and finds extremely high concetration of iron, so he hooks you to a dialysis machine to stabilize your bloods. Every metallic medical instrument in the hospital becomes attracted to you in response to the lack of iron, and as he hobbles into the room, you use your mutant power to pin him to the wall with his cane. With his last ounce of breath House rigs up the ECG machine floating nearby to emit an EMP. The whole hospital drops to the floor and you go back into a coma. Later, a gruff Canadian man resembling a honeybadger whisks you away in the middle of the night.
He prescribes ibuprofen. You have a one in a billion allergy to one of the normally inert binders in the pill. You don’t tell him the entire truth about why you missed one of the questions on a quiz you got in second grade. He has to perform an exploratory ear amputation and reattachment to treat for potential parasites which is inconclusive but the way the stitches fit so precisely hints towards a plasticization effect which can only be lupus or thermogenic pulmerization of the t-cells exacerbated by stress induced by cheating, which is why you missed the question in second grade… You actually knew the answer but cheated off your friend who had the wrong answer the whole time!
He suggests an MRI, but you keep fainting in the machine and the results are always blurry. He breaks into your house and finds WW2 memorabilia that suggests you’re far older than you look. He runs blood tests and finds extremely high concetration of iron, so he hooks you to a dialysis machine to stabilize your bloods. Every metallic medical instrument in the hospital becomes attracted to you in response to the lack of iron, and as he hobbles into the room, you use your mutant power to pin him to the wall with his cane. With his last ounce of breath House rigs up the ECG machine floating nearby to emit an EMP. The whole hospital drops to the floor and you go back into a coma. Later, a gruff Canadian man resembling a honeybadger whisks you away in the middle of the night.
Don’t be ridiculous. It’s never lupus.
It’s never lupus, but lupus is never ruled out.
<plays air guitar on his cane>