I know our life sucks. That is exactly why meditation is so helpful, and important. You can easily do a gratitude meditation - breathe in thinking about something you’re thankful for, breathe out letting that gratitude flow down from your head through your body. This will instantly help your body and brain feel better. Other meditations help us separate what we want (everything to be better) from what we actually need (air, water, food, a place to sit), and see that we cause our own suffering through attachments to our expectations, which finally gives you a real way to stop hurting yourself constantly, by letting go of the weapons you use. You already hold the key. There is honestly, no judgement in meditation. Just keep gently guiding yourself back to your breath and/or whatever you are trying to focus on, and let yourself just be you for a while. It’s surprisingly helpful.